Playing the Stock Market

I really think I have figured out how to make money on the stock market.  The only problem is I don't have enough money to put my plan in action.  So...if you want to help me out, grow your penis, or get that inheritance from your lost uncle in Nigeria just hold a $5 bill over your heart, put it in a envelope, and mail it to me c/o A Confused Old Man.
Hopefully you know I'm only joking here.  Still--I am confused about the stock market.  I'm to the point now where I think we have to play the people...and not the market.  What are the people going to do?  Of course, that doesn't take into account the fact that I believe there are people out there manipulating the stock market for personal and/or corporate gain.  Ah well.  We can discuss that another day.
Today, I'm a little confused as to why I was down 8% yesterday.  Today I'm only down 4%.  Maybe tomorrow I'll be even.  Who knows?  As long as my wife doesn't know it I'll be ok...